Man up

My dear sweet girls, I hope you never hear this from anyone, but I’m afraid you will. I heard it twice tonight. Not directly those two words, but I knew what they were telling me. 

Man up. 

I understand the term. I understand why. I may have said it to others (and by “may”, that means yes). You will most likely tell someone that in your future. Whatever the term will be then, at some point, you will say it, or be told it … 

Man up. 

But why? We are not men; nor do I  want to be. And by your love of all things girl, you won’t want to be either. Why should anyone really?

Man up. 

Out of curiosity I googled it. Urban dictionary says… “to fulfill your responsibilites as a man”. What responsibilities? Your dad mows the yard & I don’t. So does “man up” mean mow the lawn? He does it because he likes it & I don’t. I see it as a comprise. 

Man up. 

Definition #2 (still urban dictionary): … take control of a (the) situation, be strong, rise to the moment. Why is taking control being a man? Or being strong? I will admit, I’m not the strongest and I’m not always in control. I get hurt, and I cry. I was not strong today. But I have been. 

Man up. 

I have labored two children. 9 months of sharing my body,  17 hours of labor and 2 epiderls later I went to c-section. With a stapled stomach I breast feed, and pumped, and worked and learned how to become a mom while trying to still be a wife and remembering who I was. I did that twice. Then My mom passed away just days after my 37th birthday. I was just learning how to be a mom when I lost my mom. Every year I am stronger. 

Man up. 

Definition #3 (urban again): To work through impediments and obstacles without whining. Now I am a whinner, which really means, (Merrim-Webster) “to complain in an annoying way”. Doesn’t that really mean … Work through your shit without being annoying. 

Man up.

So you don’t want me to be annoying when I talk about my obstacles.  Something that is in my way, something that  prevented me from reaching my goal, an obstacle, if you will, that didn’t go as expected. Who hasn’t been there? Male or female, does it matter? 

Man up. 

I am hurt. It didn’t work out. I want to be sad, and be mad, and yes, I want to cry. Don’t I deserve to? Yes,  I will get over it. I will be strong, and I will rise above it. But do you really need to tell me this? Why is it too much to ask for someone to just let me vent without judging. 

Man up. 

Today, I am going to sulk. And be mad. And let my feelings be out there. I have earned it. I  don’t want to man up.  I was NOT born with testicles, so don’t tell me to forget about my “problem(s) because you were born with a penis, therefore it is not important to anyone that you have any problem(s)” (definition #4). 

Does that make me bitchy?

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *